FROM: MouseMerch Published Thursdays
Turkey Leg T-Shirt
A culinary rite of passage at Disney World is ingestion of a turkey leg while strolling through the park. If you do it right, you'll get more attention than Mickey. But what if you're not hungry? Wear it! The zero calorie turkey leg t-shirt.
With due credit to Debra, the Disney P.I., for bringing it to my attention, I present the Turkey Leg T-Shirt.
For a mere $36.25, plus tax, you can get your Disney turkey leg in a poly/cotton mix. The turkey leg in question is colored a clotty shade of reddish-brown, with the words "TURKEY LEG" beneath it, and seems to me one of the uglier shirts on Disney property, a very expensive example of clip art couture.
But let's do the math. After tax, a turkey leg costs about eight bucks; a turkey leg shirt, nearly forty bucks.
For the cost of one shirt, you could get five turkey legs.
Not at the same time, probably, unless 
you have a spouse and three kids, and wouldn't that be a sight: the lot of you chomping turkey legs. I bet other guests would give you plenty of room!
If you ask me, buying (and wearing) a turkey leg t-shirt proclaims to the world that you're afraid of the fowl. "I'm wearing this t-shirt", you might as well say, "because I don't have the guts (or at least enough of them) to eat a real Disney turkey leg."
And I don't buy that people who have eaten turkey legs would wear the shirt as a trophy of what they'd done.
You can't fool me. Unless your shirt has grease stains the size of bicentennial quarters, unless your fingers glisten under the hot Florida sun, unless your lips and the area around your mouth shine with a sheen of rendered fat, you ain't eaten no turkey leg.
One more thing before you rush down to Disney World and buy a turkey leg t-shirt.
Imagine yourself wearing that shirt, strutting across Frontierland, proud son looking at you with worship in his eyes. And then, approaching from the opposite direction, another man, eating a turkey leg. Your son looks at that real leg, crusty and dripping with grease, then looks at the ... thing ... on your shirt. In five seconds, he has aged five years.
Eat it. Don't wear it.
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