FROM: Wandering the World with Wally Published Mondays

DINOSAUR

Today, we feature the dinosaur: no, not Wally himself, but rather one of Wally's most ambitious wanders, back in time TO the dinosaurs, those regal but rapacious beasts best left, as Wally learns, in the past.

- by Walter Octavius March, April 11, 2011

KUNGALOOSH!

How are you, my fellow explorers? You have made a timely arrival. I have just received a communique from an Adventurer friend at The Dino Institute Museum concerning a mysterious proposition. My friend isn't interested in Paleontology, so he has invited me to embark upon this journey in his place.

Join me? It's but a short wander to Disney's Animal Kingdom and Dinoland USA where we shall find Dr. Grant Seeker.

Wally Receives His Mission

As he welcomes us into his cramped office, Dr. Seeker proposes to send me back in time, about 125 million years back in time, to the Cretaceous Period. Once there, he wishes me to find a dinosaur and return with it to the present.

I find myself excited at the prospect of such an adventure, though also full of trepidation. I wonder aloud how Dr. Seeker will send me back in time, and he explains his invention, the CTX Time Rover, but brushes aside my other questions as we are short - of all things! - on time. But I refuse to budge until I learn more about the dinosaur I shall be seeking.

It is an Iguanodon, the doctor tells me, approximately thirty feet long and sixteen feet tall. These beasts were plant eaters, though they did have a spike protruding from what might have been a primitive thumb, and this spike could be as long as six inches, a potent weapon against meat eaters.

As a meat eater myself, I make a mental note to be wary of the spike.

In haste, I board the CTX Time Rover and strap in seconds before it glides slowly through the vehicle dispatch corridor. I hear the time travel countdown commence. Now, rather late in the game, Seeker informs me that I must retrieve the Iguanodon quickly, as an asteroid is scheduled to crash into the earth shortly after my arrival. I take this new development in stride: after all, I have been in perilous spots before, but in all candor never one involving a massive rock likely to cause mass extinction.

I attempt to query Dr. Seeker further about this asteroid, but my words are lost in flashes of light and a strange sensation that abates as I find myself on a bumpy ride through a dark jungle.

The last time I was in a jungle so dark was on Tioman Island in pursuit of the Slow Loris, a creature that resembles the famous lemur of Madagascar. At night on this beautiful island, the jungles get so dark you can barely see your hand in front of your face. But I digress...

Wally Whistles for His Iguanodon

My pocket chronometer confirms that I have wandered 65 million years in the past. I am seeking a dinosaur that so far cannot be found, and the computer on my time rover informs me that a meteor shower will commence in 60 seconds. Dr. Seeker, who has remained in communication with me, dismisses the imminent meteor shower as 'just a small one'.

We do start to see some dinosaurs, but not ours. Over there is a raptor. Not concerned about the nearness of the raptor, Dr. Seeker stops the rover because the computer has identified what it thinks is an Iguanodon. The creature now comes into view and it is... a Carnosaurus! The beast is ravenous and charges the Time Rover as I heed Dr. Seeker's order to floor the gas pedal on the Rover.

A narrow escape! The next few moments of the journey are strangely tranquil, but then the computer announces the impact in 90 seconds of the asteroid. Dr. Seeker does not describe the asteroid as a 'small one', and so I assume it is the 'extinction event' he mentioned back at the Dino Institute Museum.

As I look up, I see not the asteroid but a pterodactyl swooping down. I grab my hat and fight off the beast, but in doing so the asteroid has come closer and now will impact in 60 seconds...

Just then, the rover loses traction and its wheels spin in primordial mud. I struggle to free the vehicle, and just then the Carnosaurus crashes from the jungle, baring its stupendous and sharp teeth. The rover works free, finally, but the beast is in pursuit, and the asteroid has entered the atmosphere, quite a beautiful but deadly sight.

And then, suddenly: an Iguanodon!

But it's too late. Dr. Seeker aborts my mission and activates the time machine to return me to the present. The rover seems ready to come apart, but within moments I arrive safely and immediately demand to see Dr. Seeker - who, it turns out, had a pressing engagement elsewhere and will not be available to speak with me...

Maybe that is for the best. Maybe the beasts of the past should stay in the past. But it does remind me of a story from when I was a younger man...

What's that? I'm sorry, my friends, please excuse me while I accompany these fine fellows from Dino Institute security. I'm sure they wish to take me to a comfortable spot where I can share my tale in private....

Until next time, KUNGALOOSH! And keep your eyes open for Adventure!

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