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Why Did Disney DO That?!?

About the Column

Admit it. You do it a lot. You ask yourself: Why Did Disney DO That?!? Maybe you ask others, too. Maybe you gather in groups, gnaw on turkey legs, and ponder what Disney does. But any such gab sessions inevitably lead to confusion and perhaps frustration. Because none of us have the answers. Disney has the answers, but it's not telling. The Mouse justifies its actions either with "it's part of our business plan" or the even more nebulous "it's part of Walt's vision". You deserve better. In his column, Lee Beatens will uncover the truth. Or at least deliver some entertaining rants.

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Putting a Park Where It Doesn't Belong

Lee Beatens ponders the placement of Disney's California Adventure

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Today's article features an in-house transcript from Disney's Imagineering. It provides insight into the decision-making process behind the creation of the Disney Theme Parks. Disney's California Adventure, to be precise.

What I am going to share are excerpts from a much longer document wherein an Apprentice Imagineer (AI) is learning from a Seasoned Imagineer (SI).

The document, dating from 1992, chronicles the brainstorming session for what was then to be Disney's newest Park. A Park in California. Called Disney's California Adventure (DCA).

Here is how it all began:

AI - So... what do we do first?
SI - First, we need a theme for the Park. Something unique.
AI - (Lists a dozen or so great ideas)
SI - Those are good, but since this Park is located in California, it should be about California!
AI - Why?
SI - (Ignores question) It should recreate as many California landmarks as possible.
AI - But why wouldn't people just visit the real landmarks instead of our fake ones?
SI - (Ignores question) Like a miniature Golden Gate Bridge... (Lists other Landmarks)

At this point, some pages are missing from the document, so I'll add my own commentary.

What was Disney thinking?

Disney Parks have always brought something new and unique to the world.

Disneyland recreated turn-of-the-century America. Disney's Animal Kingdom reinvented the zoo. Tokyo Sea became the ultimate Water Park featuring famous literary characters from around the world in Japan.

To follow this up, Disney builds a Park about California... in California. Really?

Let's get back to the brainstorming session:

AI - So what kind of rides and attractions will this Park have?
SI - We'll fill it with old rides from the past. Like a Ferris Wheel! A Swing Ride! A Parachute Drop!
AI - But didn't Walt Disney make those rides obsolete when he built Disneyland?
SI - (Ignores question) And we'll have those cheesy Midway Games like the Duck Shoot!
AI - But aren't those from small town carnivals? And where will our Disney Characters be?
SI - (Ignores questions) We'll keep it all vintage!
AI - (In desperation) Will there be anything Disney-related in this Park?

Again, some of the pages are missing, so I'll interject once more.

What was Disney thinking?

Filling the Park with antiquated rides and attractions that no one liked any more was probably the most stupid decision Disney made for DCA. And then stripping it of the trademark Disney atmosphere only further confused Theme Park visitors.

But this wasn't the end of the blunders:

AI - Will there at least be a signature parade filled with everyone's favorite Disney Characters?
SI - Parade, yes. Disney Characters, no.
AI - (Exasperated) Then what will it be about?
SI - A California Goddess who appears in multiple forms. Like a Chinese Opera Goddess!
AI - A what?
SI - And we'll have Day of the Dead dancing skeletons from Mexico. 20 feet high!
AI - Skeletons?
SI - And we'll call it... Eureka!
AI - (Stunned silence)

And this is where the document ends.

I can only assume that the Apprentice Imagineer quit and went to work for Universal. Remember, this brainstorming session was pure BS (Blue Sky) thinking! Yes, the sky was going to be the limit for this newest Park. Oy!

I hope by now you realize that I made up the document.

But it isn't hard to believe that the real brainstorming sessions did indeed follow my fictitious pattern!

What was Disney thinking?

DCA probably would have gone over great in China where there is a strong interest in Americana. And the average Chinese likely wouldn't be planning a day trip to the real California.

Come on, Disney, if you had stuck DCA in, say, India, it probably would have been a hit!

DCA could have been the right idea, but it was in totally the wrong place.

The good news is that Disney has figured this out. Maybe the complaints and the fact that Disney Theme Park enthusiasts have stayed away in droves clued them in, eh?

I'm genuinely excited about the renovations and expansion of DCA. Cars Land alone should save this ailing Park, doing for DCA what Pixar did for Disney.

My only remaining complaint is the rather bland Entrance makeover that Disney plans.

Hey, Disney, have you visited Disney's Hollywood Studios in Florida recently? At all? Knowing that DCA needs to create a singular identity to survive, I wonder if copying one of their other less popular Parks is a good idea? Only time will tell.

And if it isn't, we'll all say: Why did Disney DO that?!?

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